City

10 reasons why I hate the Bombay rains


Vijayeta Basu, Mumbai Rains, Gene Kelly, Singin' in the Rain

No, Gene Kelly, that is NOT how I feel.

And so it begins. Shirley Manson maybe happy when it rains, but I don’t want to spend the rest of the rainy season constantly tweeting about how much I hate it, so let me purge my annoyance away.

1. The tragic tale of potholes and floods
The tragedy is that I always see BMC workers fixing the roads in Khar and Bandra, but somehow the potholes keep multiplying and growing bigger. Travelling on these roads is life threatening; unless you have a big fat SUV. I, however, travel by rickshaws. What it means is that my internal organs are all jumbled up inside. The rain makes it worse, so I weep.

On that note, listen to this song.

2. Late, forever

Image courtesy - Rediff.com

“Mother, I’m never coming home, I love you”.

I’m always on time. ALWAYS. My friends hate me for this, but whatever. The rains reign havoc on my punctuality. Trains are delayed, traffic refuses to budge, taxis and rickshaws snub those drowning in the rain – the whole city comes to a standstill (but “resilient” Mumbaikars still persevere on). Worse, this is a perfect excuse for my aforementioned friends to use when they are late for personal reasons.

3. Dear MTNL, are you there?
It’s me, a harrowed customer. I will tolerate anything, but I WILL NOT tolerate not having high-speed Internet.

4. Umbrellas: friend or foe?
Umbrellas aren’t what they used to be and old-school ones are too cumbersome to lug around. On many occasions, my flaky umbrella has turned inside out. It’s embarrassing to wrestle an umbrella while trying to keep yourself dry at the same time. Also, I’m forever in fear of being impaled in the eye by someone else’s umbrella.

5. Slippery when wet

Vijayeta Basu

Say NO to Accidents

‘Tis the season for much folly.  I’m an accident-prone girl, and the wet roads and floors do little to help this situation. I will fall down, in an undignified way. I know it. The rains know it. I hate it.

6. Gumboot-ed 

Who can be offended by these plain black wellies?

Who can be offended by these plain black wellies?

To avoid slipping on the streets during the rains, I invested in sensible gumboots last year. Much to my chagrin, they weren’t well-received anywhere outside Bandra. Little beggar kids laughed at me, ladies in the train glared at me, it wasn’t fun.

7. Sticky situation
Ladies, I’m sure you will agree with me on this one. Apart from disgusting muck flying around everywhere and destroying our precious attires, the rain does no favours to our equally precious hair. It’s all sticky and icky, every day. You might as well toss your flattening irons away for a few months.

8. Banished from the outside world
Want to have a smoke outside? Denied. Want to go for a jog? Denied. Want to throw a party on a lovely terrace? Denied.

9. Have pet, will stink

Vijayeta Basu, Poshto, Chihuahua

“I’m gonna stink up yo house, woman.”

My dog, Poshto, is a Chihuahua and like a good Mexican, he enjoys his siestas in the sun. When he doesn’t sunbathe, he gets extra-stinky. I love him, but I don’t particularly like smelly blankets.

10. Incessant rain = Incessant tweets
I’m not against tweets of the helpful kind; but the overdose of “I vuw rains”, “I h8 rains” and “Oh look, it is raining! Hahaha!” on my timeline is a bit annoying. This is the main reason for this post. I’m getting all the hate out of my system.

Now, don’t think I detest rains with every fiber of my being. I think the weather is perfect for late night drives and hanging out on my balcony with my stinky Poshto and a steaming cup of bitter black coffee. I love rains, just a little bit though.

So, what do you hate/love about the rains? Do let me know in the comments section below!

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4 thoughts on “10 reasons why I hate the Bombay rains

  1. Yess hating the rains. Potholes n muck flying about. My poochy refuses to get out tr a pee n a big one so im hawk eye watching her incase she decides to go indoors.
    But the gumboots? Probably the best investment ever. Have those ppl that laughed at u heard of leptospirosis? Wear those boots. Flat sticky hair has an expensive solution — dry shampoo. Although I can hardly say its available in bombay. :)

  2. Lol! The klutz that I am, I can’t do without gumboots in this weather. I was merely pointing out how horrid I feel when I wear them, especially while travelling in trains! As for dry shampoo, I’ve used it before when I went camping. It makes the hair smell nice, but damn my frizzy hair is difficult to tame!

    • I have always loved the rains from the time I was little . Staying by the sea added to it . While standing on the fence waves splashing on us . Very romantic as I am found it dreamy . As little as I was , little did I know about the future of the roads , the traffic jams and walking through the nightmare when all the roads were flooded and we had to swim through the dirty filthy water on that unfortunate day . It’s a pity to see mumbai in this state . Shweta

  3. Yes I love the rains behind my Fenesta windows – where everything is as so surreal. All dreams are shattered once I step out for my daily work – potholes glaring at me, the ever congested roads threatening my wordsworth like feeling … and I keep hunting for a rhyme in this ever chaotic city … (Saumitri)

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